This week it’s time to look at Star Trek: The Original Serie’s episode, Spock’s Brain.
Now it’s time for Star Trek’s third season premiere Spock’s Brain. An episode so heinous that everyone seems to hate it. Will I? Let’s find out.
We open with a red alert. A warning I’m sure meant to keep fans from watching. All of a sudden an alien in go-go boots pops up and immediately Kirk thinks of 1,000 different things to say in order to sleep with her. Obviously that didn’t go his way as he ended up passed out. Shocking.
Spock is wearing Scott Steiner’s headdress and is somehow “worse than dead”. So that’s the kind of episode we’re on. Oh, and Spock’s brain is gone. Apparently Vulcan’s can survive without a brain, something the writer’s room apparently believed they could do when writing this episode.
James Kirk wants to take Spock with them as they search for Spock’s brain and now we’re doing Weekend at Spock’s. Of course, we get the obligatory “24 hours or he dies” moment.
After landing on a planet, Kirk and company ambush Tom Hanks from Castaway. He tells Kirk that there’s a group of aliens who bring “pain and delight.” So far this episode is all the pain. Bones comes down with Spock and we get some outlandishly silly dramatic music when Spock looks at Kirk.
I’m crying this is so hilariously bad.
Kirk and Spock somehow communicate through the communicator. and then they meet the Eymorg. We find out the women (Eyomrg) and men (Morg) have become big ol morons thanks to relying on technology. After Kara, the leader of the Eymorg, figures out Kirk’s gonna steal Spock’s brain back, she zaps him and Shatner goes full ham as he falls to the ground. A fight scene and Kirk reconnects with Spock, discovering his location. The worst scavenger hunt ever continues.
They encounter Kara again and Kirk uses Spock’s body like a remoted controlled Vulcan to get control of the situation. After Kirk forces Kara into the worst hair dryer I’ve ever seen, she becomes uber-smart and now holds everyone at gunpoint. Never let your sidearm leave your holster, Kirk! Kirk gets his phaser back and the plan is to insert Bones into the same device to make him super smart as well so that he can put Spock’s brain back in.
Obviously they succeed. That’s it. That’s all there is to it.
Let’s go to the scores.
Acting: Did anyone order the ham? Shatner chews so much scenery that you’d think he’s made of bubble gum. That said there is a charm to it.
Grade: 4/5
Writing: The aliens are just hot chicks in go-go boots, who speak like Valley girls but even less coherent. It’s like a bad Rick and Morty sketch given life. Also, the entire episode revolves around Spock’s freakin brain being snatched. I mean, come on! How dumb.
Grade: 2/5
Design: Who am I to argue with short skirts and go-go boots? The aliens don’t look to dynamic but this is the ’60s and we’ll allow for some leeway here. The Controller that Spock’s brain was in was very nifty and reminded me of the Fallout series.
Grade: 4/5
Special Effects: Do I judge it for what it is or what we’d get? The series in the ’60s was pretty advanced all things considered. Sure the ship’s on wires and they just use a flashing green effect for phaser fire, but that’s all part of the charm.
Grade: 4/5
Enjoyability: This was so campy I thought I was 15 and at football camp all over again. Hot, dumb women who need a man to survive and who only use men for pleasure? I mean, damn, this was as ’60s as it gets. There’s no way this episode would’ve gotten greenlit in the ’90s, let alone today. The cheesiness of Shatner’s acting is impeccable, but the remoted controlled Spock was unsettling and the entire premise was just asinine.
Grade: 2/5
Overall: 16/25 (64%)
– It’s not entirely terrible, much like with the Next Generation episode Darmock, there’s a language barrier that must be overcome but the episode’s moral quandary is stifled by being obvious. No living being has the right to snatch a person’s brain. Even if it means the end of your society. That hurt the overall grade. Still, not as bad as advertised.